xanthan gum

I don't really like staccato rhythm, but you handled it well. I have a slight feeling about what you were talking about, but for those who aren't farmiliar with your ...

This is beautiful. And the "volume" that timjim speaks of was at the perfect level for this poem. I'm just a mediocore range, but this was soft, gentle, graceful - ...

I love the rhyme structure, but it seems as if you were forcing the rhymes. Please don't - it just butchers the beauty that you have here. By the way, ...

This has a beautiful meaning, but some of the lines were a bit awkward - lacking form or flow. examples: One I cannot describe, But I do not wear armor ...

This was good idea and a good poem, but I think you could expand on it. Because it was so short, it didn't have justifiable room to make it's own ...

Change the line breaks up a bit, then we'll talk =]

Onion skin is on my bitter lips tonight A sidewalk canvas open to the mytique that lays near me - side by rotten side wheels to the carpet pavement hand ...

This was a bit too repetitive near the end, but I loved the beginning. I also belive you need to replace the world "cheesy". I mean, I use it all ...

The impressive vocabulary is okay for this poem, as I feel it added to your educated feeling. Just don't try to force it upon more passionate poems...or....softer ones. I felt ...

Your rhyming seemed a bit forced and rhythm was severly off meter. Your rhyming was random at first, then in pattern - and so it kept switching back and force. ...

I loved this poem, especially the poweful ending. You have quite an adept hand there.... Otherwise, my only suggestion is that when you are describing something you, much like I, ...

Please don't sacrifice the other more valuable aspects of a poem to something like rhyme and meter. It makes the poem appear elementary, and I know you are above that. ...

I enjoyed this poem greatly. It was more straightfoward - the casual talk mode that is, as usual, discriminating poetic form. The great way you incorporated this feeling made the ...

I know this poem meant a lot to you...I don't know who this person is, nor what relations existed between you in the past or what will happen in the ...

It seems as though we have a new poet on the street. =] Everything you said had meaning, force, and was graceful - never too strong, never too superflous or ...